


Vines constrict around my heart

by Henryhenry_nicholls



Category: Cricket RPF
Genre: Hanahaki Disease, M/M, Suicidal Thoughts, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-06
Updated: 2020-12-06
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:42:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27909172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Henryhenry_nicholls/pseuds/Henryhenry_nicholls
Summary: Mitchell Santner never wanted to tell anybody that he'd gotten Hanahaki but once you pass out because of it in front of your teammates you don't really tend to have any other choice. He just had to not say who it was and he wouldn't ruin anyone's lives, that was a secret he was planning on taking to the grave. Life never tends to be that nice to him.
Relationships: Minor or Background Relationship(s), Trent Boult/Tim Southee, Unrequited Mitchell Santner/Trent Boult
Comments: 7
Kudos: 7





	Vines constrict around my heart

**Author's Note:**

> I know this is a mostly unwritten pairing and the kiwis aren't massively popular for fic, but I wrote it before choosing which characters to write about and these characters fit what i'd written the best. 
> 
> So I should probably clarify the specific version of hanahaki and hanahaki removal surgery that I'm talking about. Basically like most hanahaki you have a plant growing around your heart and you cough up the petals. Mitch doesn't actually cough up any petals because he's too weak to cough that hard. and in this universe, the surgery removes all your memories of the other person as well as any thoughts directly relating to them such as why you might not have wanted to get the surgery for instance but it doesn't remove the knowledge that you didn't want the surgery.
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy it, sorry if it's depressing and please let me know what you think, it's my first dip back into fic in a while.
> 
> (also I may have only just barely edited this so if you see a mistake bear with me)

There’s a split second before you hit the floor where you reconsider your life choices and wonder if this was the way you were actually meant to go. For Mitch that was now, you see, Mitch had never meant to actually kill himself, not even in this weird roundabout way but he didn’t really mind it anymore. Because sometimes life decides to fuck you up, give you hanahaki for your mate who’s in a very happy committed relationship. If it had been anyone else Mitch would have told them, he probably would have told them, maybe. But he just couldn’t bear to say it. He’d thought it was just a crush at first and that he could ignore it, and god he tried, but coughing up flower petals tends to make that harder. Hopeless love and all that, it gets draining, so he just didn’t do anything. Sure he could have gotten the surgery but then how could he explain to Trent why he no longer knew him. How could he explain to Tim that his love for Tim’s boyfriend had been killing him. So he just didn’t, he’d die without giving any answers and the team would be better off not having known who it was. They’d be sad sure but-

“MITCH??” He let out a breath in acknowledgement of the voice but that just made the vine in his chest constrict tighter and he tries to raise a hand to clutch at his chest.

“Shit call an ambulance.” Was that Kane? Mitch wasn’t sure, he could hear the movement of people scrambling to react but the noises got quieter and quieter till he was passed out on the floor.

“Mitchell?” Mitch blinked his eyes open slowly to the bright light of a hospital. He was immediately filled with panic that his vine had been removed. He moved his head to see who had spoken and with the movement, he felt the familiar constriction in his chest and almost breathed a sigh of relief. 

He took a second to get his bearings before remembering there was a doctor looking at him waiting for a response. He gave a small nod.

“We are currently running some tests to see if it is too late to surgically remove the vine, is it possible for you to confess?”

Mitch immediately shook his head, “No, I won’t confess, but don’t bother saving me, I don’t want that, please.” His throat felt strained and it almost hurt to talk. 

“I’m afraid we aren’t legally allowed to do that Mitchell.” The gears in Mitch’s brain started whirring, he couldn’t let them perform the surgery.

“Are my teammates here?” The doctor looked confused but answered with a ‘yes’ anyway.

“Am I allowed to see them?”

“I don’t see why not, but you can’t see them all at once, just one or two.” That sounds good to Mitch, he only needs one anyway.

“Can you send Trent in?”

“I- of course.” Mitch smiled at the doctor, he probably thought that Mitch was going to say goodbye or confess, not likely. He was just trying to speed up the progression of his hanahaki so they couldn’t operate on him.

Mitch sighs contentedly and lets out a cough as he feels the vine coil tighter in his chest.

“Mitch, hi,” Trent sounds unsteady and unsure of what to do next.

“Hey,” Mitch’s voice is softer than he’s felt in a while, “I’m really sorry.”

“No!” Trent lets out a sad sounding protest.

“It wasn’t supposed to be this way.”

“Why- why didn’t you say anything, come on Mitchy, please.” Trent sounds desperate and Mitch’s vine constricts a little more.

“I didn’t want anyone to worry and I didn’t want to ruin anything.” His voice is shaking but there’s a cool calmness there that feels absurdly out of place in the situation.

“So you just waited till you were on your deathbed to let us know something was wrong? We could have helped, Mitch, you could DIE.” He chokes back a sob. 

“I know, I’m sorry but this was the only way, I couldn’t tear apart the team. Besides its not too bad of an outcome.”

“Mitchell. You. Are. Dying.”

“Yes, I’m aware, I don’t mind.”

“Mitch, come on, at least tell us who it is. So we can do SOMETHING. We all need you here, we want you here.”

“No, you don’t, besides, it’s impossible, they don’t like me back and if they did I’m not sure I’d want that anymore.”

“Mitch-”

“Please.”

“We don’t want you to die, the team needs you.” Mitch shakes his head, you don’t. 

“No. No, you don’t get to talk to me about this, not now.” 

“Then when? We are having this conversation Mitch but If you don’t confess you’ll probably die, they’re checking whether they can even perform the surgery anymore.”

“I know, Trent please.”

“No. Mitch please come on.”

Mitch sighed, he felt the vine constrict again in his chest, he wasn’t sure how much more he could take. His breathing was feeling far more laboured now and he could see that the doctors were entering the room. The last thing Mitch saw before everything went dark was Trent being ushered out of the room.

\--------------------  
\--------------------  
\--------------------

Mitch wakes up with a feeling of wrongness. The doctor from earlier was standing in his hospital room.

“You’re incredibly lucky, it was a miracle that we managed to save you.”

“No!” Mitch doesn’t fully remember the feelings but he knows he didn’t want this, he didn’t want to be the person miraculously saved. He wasn’t sure at all why now but he remembered just waiting for the vine to kill him.

“It’s okay, you’ll be on bed rest for a while but we can help you try and get reoriented.”

“My team was here right?” The doctor says yes and that they’ve been waiting for him, Mitch thinks what he’s feeling might be relief. He’s not sure he wants to be here but maybe talking to his captain will help.

“Can I see Kane?

“Yes of course, if that’s who you want to see.”

“What?” The doctor was acting like there was someone else he might want to see, but they don’t say anything more as they leave the room to go and get Kane.

“Mitch?” The relief in Kane’s face is obvious. “God, everyone’s been so worried. Especially Trent, said you didn’t want to live all that much.” Trent? He couldn’t remember a Trent. Whoever Trent was, he’d been right.

“Tell him that I’m sorry, I think I’ll be okay now though.”

“Tell him yourself, slinky. You’re alive after all.” 

“Yeah of course, can you ask the doctors how many visitors I’m allowed right now.” Mitch is putting the pieces together now, He’s fairly certain what had happened but not why it had gone the way it had.

When Kane comes back there are two people following him, Tim, and another man, holding Tim’s hand who must be Trent. He suddenly has all the pieces to the puzzle about what had happened, he just has to act his way out of it. He’s never been a good actor but now is as good as any time to learn. 

“Hi guys, I’m really sorry.” Suddenly Trent was crying and Tim put an arm around him to comfort the man.

“God slink, you had me so worried.” Mitch smiles at the man.

“Hey,” Trent sounds suddenly slightly more upbeat, “Since we didn’t get it earlier can we have that conversation now?” Shit, Mitch didn’t have a clue what conversation that might be.

“What conversation?” he asks tentatively. He hopes this doesn’t break his cover.

“Don’t play dumb, Mitch, it doesn’t suit you.” Mitch is internally screaming, It’s probably about the hanahaki but Mitch can’t say specifically what. And he thinks that maybe he should try to be honest about it. 

“I’m not.” Trent’s eyes widen.

“Wait-” he cuts himself off and Mitch can see the realisation dawning in all three men’s eyes. “You-” he cuts himself off again.

“I’m sorry.” 

“No,” Trent says. 

“What?”

“I’m sorry, I should be sorry, you should have felt able to tell me.”

“How would that have helped, from where I’m sitting I think that the Mitch with the vine made the only decision he could think of. I just can only guess at his reasoning.”

“We could have worked something out, we’re mates Mitch, or we were.” Mitch smiles softly, almost sadly, he can tell nobody wants him to apologise again though.

“So let’s start again,” Trent says brightly 

“What?” Mitch is visibly confused.

“Hi, you’re Mitch, right? I’m Trent Boult.”

“Uh yeah, Hi, nice to meet you Trent.” the two smile awkwardly and Kane and Tim look just as awkward. But fuck if it wasn’t nice that Trent wanted to try and form another friendship. God, he was going to have to be more careful this time though.


End file.
